I'm Back, I Guess

I considered making some serious first post here, about myself or writing or musing about life. Perhaps some ironically painful thing about how blogging is dead and I'm just trying to practice resurrection.

Truth is, I've blogged before. Had several decent runs, but for one reason or another I burned it all down after each of them. Consequently, this feels sort of like being at Target and running into that girl you used to date in college. You awkwardly stand with hands in your pockets. "Hey. I still exist. Stuff has been happening. How are you?"

So, Internet, I still exist. Where do we start with getting caught back up?

I'm a pastor now. All official and everything. Which is a blessing, in the sense of "blessing" that entails feelings of massive inadequacy and occasional nightmares. (You know those test nightmares you used to have in school? It's basically that, but I'm standing in the pulpit and I'm afraid to step out from behind it because I still, even after 20 years in various educational institutions, don't remember to put on pants in these dreams. And also, it's Jesus mad at me instead of Mrs. Rasmussen).

I've got three kids. I guess I had one of them last time we talked. They're great, in the sense of "great" where I really enjoy them between mental crises about how much I'm messing them up and moments where I want to pull my hair out.

And actually, despite my neurotic ramblings, things are pretty good. We've moved to small-town Illinois and I'm serving a church here, a church full of people I like quite a bit and who are good at loving and serving each other. I've been around the ministry block long enough to know you don't always get that kind of blessing, and I'm deeply grateful for them. After a number of years of working full time in a job I didn't really love so I could work part-time in ministry so I could maybe do it full time someday, just being able to be a pastor seems like a pretty sweet gig.

Elizabeth - my wife, since I know your internet-memory is pretty short - is as beautiful a blessing as ever. Puts up with all my eccentricities and actually enjoys some of them.

Also, she has cancer. But let's not discuss that right now.

Anyway, Internet, good to see you. I know you have a lot of cat videos and political rants to get back to, so I'll awkwardly rush away to pretend like I urgently need to look at deodorant or something. Maybe we'll bump into each other again sometime.


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